Pressure makes pearls.
Today, I really felt it. He told me when we go back to school, we can see each other all the time. I told him I really really liked the idea of that. He agreed.
I usually wear my claddagh ring facing out like so.
And today I turned it. He has my heart now.
Well this came out of left field. And he's two hours away. Of course its just my luck.
I started talking to Matt just a little after he broke up with his ole girlfriend. I was trying to be a good friend and talk him through it. I didn't intend for it to go anywhere at all. After staying up till the sun came up for about three days in a row, I finally asked if he was a texter. He jumped all over it and gave me his number. We literally texted all day. He'd send me a 'good morning' and we would talk till I said a 'goodnight'. This happened for about a week. Then the weekend rolled around. He kept asking me what I was doing on Monday, and wouldn't tell me why. Finally, he told me he was going to try and come see me. Bear in mind, hes in Loveland, Ohio. About two hours away. This was a big deal to me.
Monday comes, and hes getting to Louisville around 7 at night. Mom was totally cool with him staying the night. We sat on my bed and listened to music and looked at pictures for a good two hours before we decided where we wanted to eat. We settled on Applebees. I wasn't sure if he considered it a date or just to visit a friend. But when he paid, I figured it out. We came back to my house and watched movies among other things till 7 am. After my parents and sister left for school/work, we went to sleep. Around noon we got up and went to St. Matt's mall. And I attempted to show him around Bardstown Road. Since he brought his dads car down here, he had to get home so his dad could go to work. Boo. So he left around 730.
He told me today that his dad is having a retirement party on June 5th and he wants me to come up and stay there for the night. I absolutely cannot wait. But I'm actually really nervous. Apparently his mom and his ex were really good friends. His mom is upset that he's talking to someone so soon after he ended his relationship with his last girl. But I shouldn't be too worried. Parents usually love me, and I can make her love me too.
My Thoughts:
I really really ended up liking this kid more than i thought i would. I had a math class with him in the spring at Morehead and I met him through friends that hung out outside of my dorm building. He's 6'6", and is a total sports beast. He still currently still plays paintball, and works with the Morehead football team. Oh, and hes an ROTC boy. :]
His ideas and habits are a lot like mine. Granted I'm Atheist, he is Catholic. I was raised Catholic, so I know what he's talking about.
We listen to the same fucked up play list. Literally a mixture of so many different artists and genres. Its kind of scary.
I totally understand his army/ROTC stuff because of my dad. Because of the military, I was born in Germany.
I physically love his height. He makes me feel/look like a midget and makes fun of me for it. But he thinks its cute. I have to take 2 steps for every one he takes.
My forehead is in easy kissing range for him.
He doesn't look like it much, but he's so so strong.
I feel safe around him.
All of this it totally out of character for me. I'm usually not one to fall for a boy like this. I'm usually one for tatted and pierced boys. But i like this transition.
Here's to new beginnings.
I'm not a religious person by any means, but this song has gotten me through finals week.
Hallelujah.
I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty
in the moonlight
overthrew you
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne,
she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Maybe I've been here before
I know this room, I've walked this floor
I used to live alone before I knew you
I've seen your flag on the marble arch
love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
There was a time you'd let me know
What's real and going on below
But now you never show it to me do you?
Remember when I moved in you?
The holy dark was moving too
And every breath we drew was hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Maybe there's a God above
And all I ever learned from love
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
It's not a cry you can hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
8.00am Anatomy final. Enough said.
Oh, sweet sunshine. The root of my daily happiness. After I was finished with finals for the day, I went to eat with a few friends. After we left aduc we went to Dairy Queen.
Nothing is better than riding down 60 with the windows rolled down and music turned up. I was wearing a halter top, so the wind was blowing my hair around on my shoulders. I just closed my eyes and took every sensation in. The sun, the wind, the music, and the company. Never in my life have I felt more carefree.
I wish life could be like this every day.